Tuesday, September 11, 2018

Gramma Myers.


I wish there was more time. Even with 88 years on this earth, I still wish there were more time. The world was better and brighter with her in it. Somehow more right. Gramma Myers was funny and witty and smart and kind and snarky and generous and sassy and fun and tough. She's the kind of person who gave us savings bonds for gifts throughout childhood because she saw we had more than enough clothes and toys. Gramma is also the one who encouraged me to draw and to write as a child. I can remember her giving me a diary, telling me about journaling, and encouraging me to write. And later in life when I started blogging she shared with me how much she enjoyed each one and asked me to have them emailed to her every time one was posted. She's the Gramma who would send us calling cards way back when you needed them in order to call long distance because she always wanted us to have a way to contact her.




She was the kind of person who didn't mind telling you when she disagreed or disapproved of a choice you made. Mostly because I think she was so sure of who she was and was such a genuine person that she couldn't just fake it. Gramma was the kind of person who would unapologetically correct you mid-sentence if you used incorrect grammar. And ya know what? I'm a better writer/speaker/thinker for it. Another one of my favorite Gramma stories was from a trip I took with my little sister the summer of 2008. Ashley and I were with Gramma and she introduced us to one of her sweet friends. Her friend was saying hello to us when she noticed Ashley's nose ring and said, "Oh! She has a diamond in her nose!" and without skipping a beat Gramma said, "Well... diamonds are a girls best friend!" Add loyal to that list above of things I love about her.




One of my favorite trips to visit Gramma was the time Tony surprised me for my 22nd birthday. She got to show us many of the places she loves that we've come to love, too. We went to get "Cortez dogs" which were delicious fish hot dogs, around to all the best beach spots, and to Cha Cha Coconuts at St. Armand's Circle -- all the places we go to every visit now. Gramma had a slot machine in her spare bedroom and it was on that trip she told us it didn't work anymore and that she would either have to pay someone a bunch of money to fix it or maybe get rid of it. Tony offered to take a look at it and to our surprise he ended up fixing it! She was delighted and he scored some major brownie points that trip.




A year later I went to visit Gramma for Thanksgiving with my sister and brother-in-law. I think it was a good time of year for a visit because Amanda had the time off from teaching and I had the time off from college.  It wasn't until we were there that Gramma shared with us how much it meant to her to have us there specifically at Thanksgiving. That it was right around Thanksgiving when my Grampa Fred had a stroke and died shortly after and that the holiday was always a harsh reminder of it all for her. I was really moved by her sharing that piece of herself with us.



Although it just happened, it doesn't at all feel real that she's gone. Whether or not we were in constant contact throughout these last 30+ years, Gramma has been a unchanging part of my life. No matter what - I knew she was there. And more than anything, I took that for granted. Don't take one moment with anyone for granted. Don't wait to call someone until you feel less socially awkward. Don't wait to visit someone until you're making plans to attend their funeral. Visit your person. Call your person. Tell them and show them you love them. Let them know what they mean to you. Don't wait until it's too late for them to hear it.

One moment she was here
And then she was gone
along with the chance I had 
to give her all the beautiful things 
I was holding for her in my heart.

So they are still there.
And I'll hold them tight.
Until I get the chance to give them back to her.


I love you, Gramma. And I'll carry so many parts of you along with me.

Monday, September 3, 2018

Marriage Monday: Don't Underestimate the Day Date!

I just had the best Monday I've had in a long time.

Tony surprised me with a day date and we rode Bird scooters around Memphis today! It. Was. So. Fun.



To say I was intimidated up front is an understatement. Though I LOVE trying new things, this was totally out of my comfort zone! Having to ride alongside traffic made me nervous at first. Riding a scooter takes balance while riding an electric scooter takes balance and timing and it's kinda scary to go that fast!!! But also SUPER fun.

We started in Midtown and decided on a whim to ride all the way Downtown, get a late lunch at Huey's, and then ride them back. Truly the only downside (besides me being clumsy the entire time) was my scooter dying halfway back in an area of town that didn't have any scooters! It took us a little bit to track another one down during a super hot part of the day and of course Tony was a complete gentleman and insisted I take his scooter and he would run alongside me which was so sweet. I tried to protest and asked him why should he have to give up his scooter and he said, "Because I'm the runner." So. True! And thank God for that. We finally found an area nearby with scooters and we got two that were charged up and headed back.

It was one of the BEST dates I have ever been on. I laughed and smiled so much and was pushed just enough out of my comfort zone to make the date even more different, special, and meaningful. Most of all I loved reconnecting with Tony in our vibrant city on a beautiful late-summer day.





Which brings me to my point: DON'T underestimate the power of the day date!!! I get it... there is just something a little magical about the nighttime. It's typically the time of day reserved for most of our sensual moments. Meanwhile, days are for getting things done so that you can take it easy at night. We run the errands in the morning so we can have fun later. But spending the afternoon with my husband and the sun and the river and a scooter was pretty close to perfection. So if daytimes work best for dating your spouse -- get out there and day date the crap out of each other.