Chores {Marriage Monday}

In an attempt to put off some housework I should currently be doing I'll instead write a blog post about chores...

Before we had kids and we had unlimited time to talk about our relationships, my sister and I had a conversation about duties around the house. Do you split them up evenly? Do you share the tasks? Do you have set, specific chores you do regularly? Or do you switch them up?

My sister was of the mindset that if her and her husband switched up the tasks and didn't assign specific chores to "his or hers" then they wouldn't get burnt out on them. Which is a good idea in theory. But was about six years and three kids ago. And I'm pretty sure they have designated chores these days. 

For the most part we have our assigned chores around here. He takes out the trash. {Reason #15 I love my husband: He takes out our yucky trash for me!} I do the dishes. He's supposed to be in charge of the laundry. (I loathe the laundry.) Which mostly means he will put them in the washer & dryer & then once they're clean they sit in a basket for the longest time. To be fair - we have way too many clothes. It makes me want to throw them away and live minimally - just have capsule, versatile wardrobes. I really think that if we had a more functional laundry room that I would enjoy the task a little more. I do the cooking. He mows the lawn. I do the grocery shopping. We both do bedtime for the kids. (Or is that not supposed to be considered a chore...) 

It just makes me wonder what it's like in other households. Do you guys switch up the housework or is it usually done by the same person each week? Or is it more like our house and you just put off all the chores until you absolutely have to do them?

Tony once fell asleep while in the middle of reading his anniversary card from me. That's talent. But this is what we would all rather be doing instead of doing chores. Sleeping.

Life Lately.

So it has been a while since I've been on this thing. I feel bad about that.

Well, we've got a five year-old, a three-year old, and a one year-old. All are doing amazing things in their own stages...

Presley: Miss Presley. She is resilient. She's on her third kindergarten teacher this year. The first one wasn't a good fit and there were more kids that signed up than expected so a new teacher was hired. I offered for Presley to move classes so off we went to teacher number two. She stuck around a few weeks and for personal reasons she stepped away from the position. So... lucky #3. Her current teacher seems to be a great fit personally, so we will see how this thing shakes out. I hope and pray her teacher puts her heart and soul into teaching these babies. They deserve it. Presley is so smart and loves to learn but the second she feels anything but perfect in her schoolwork she becomes pretty upset. Clearly something we'll have to work on. I want so much for learning to be fun for her and for her to not have to work about perfection. We really haven't loved her school this year so we are going to try to get her into another school next year and if that doesn't pan out I really am considering home schooling. OH! And she recently lost her first tooth!! She's got three more wiggly teeth, too.

Molly: Phew. This kid has such a big heart. She's so damn funny without even trying or realizing. Her personality is big and her feelings are big. At this point it feels like she'll be in pull-ups for the rest of her life! She poops on the potty every time but pee? It seems like most of the time she doesn't even realize when she pees. But she has started to write her name and HOLY CRAP it's fantastic!!!! She's three. She is such a smart kid! She's a little sponge and the things Presley is learning Molly picks up so quickly. She is quirky and beautiful and moody and her smile can light up a room. I can't wait to send her to preschool next year and see her flourish and to start to really learn boundaries, too. (She is a boundary pusher whereas Presley is a rule follower!) But we have got to master this potty training business first...

Crosby: Another kid with a megawatt personality. (Of course I'm bias.) He's really showing us who he is lately and it's so wonderful getting to know him. Then again he's currently in the stage where he pushes every single limit all day everyday. It makes the days extra long and my patience extra thin. But at the end of every day it is worth it and I love these kids so much. Crosby cracks all of us up. He's also a fan of climbing all the things possible. Which believe it or not we have an extraordinary amount of things to climb in this house. His first birthday came and went in a shock. I've got some catching up to do in all their baby books... Presley's only goes up to the first day of school so once I get caught up I will be done with hers.... what. the. heck. That went fast. Crazy to think how fast Molly and Crosby are getting older, too. Speaking of his sisters - Crosby adores them. His relationship with each of them is different and beautiful. He absolutely loves his daddy these days. And he loves mommy. He is a big sweetheart but man does he already have a temper when things don't go his way!

Things with Tony's job aren't going so well. He already works so much and now they're just finding out their hours are increasing... again. It's always something up there. Since they are commission based pay their employers can do some pretty unethical practices legally. It's frustrating as hell. 11 hour days are STUPID long days. He's doing that five days a week, sometimes six days a week depending on the week. That's excessive. And frustrating. And lonely. I feel so much of the time of my life the last four years that we're drowning in so many aspects. We can't catch up on anything. Not to mention our marriage doesn't fair well at this pace. I see that it has such a negative impact on us and I know how fragile love is, how short life can be. I want to make changes to make a happier life for ourselves but how do you do that when you depend on the paycheck? It makes it more difficult to make changes. I've considered finding child care for the kids and getting a job as well so that he could take a pay cut to take a job that takes better care of him than his current employers do.

Since we don't really love the experience we've had in Presley's current school we've tossed around the idea of possibly trying to move to a more desirable school district. I'm not sure if that is a possibility for us financially at the moment, but I wish (for many reasons) that we could make it work. I don't know... lately I am just waiting for something to change. For something to get better. Or truly for the other shoe to drop. It feels like at any moment things could just start falling apart for us. We're holding on in so many aspects by tape and glue. Truly.

Thanksgiving and Christmas are coming and that's amazing. It's a mood lifter. This time of year is special. Thank goodness. My 30th birthday is right around the corner and it's weird to think I'm getting older. I'm grateful for another year to look forward to and another year behind me. But sometimes it feels like I stopped being me or stopped existing as me a while back. Maybe when I started having kids. Like part of your being just stops there. Maybe this feeling will pass once they're out of the young stage but I have a feeling that won't be the case.

We've loved living so close to Amanda & family!!! Absolutely love it. It makes living farther from Ashley hurt a little more, that's for sure. Makes us miss her more. We're itching to get out to visit but it seems like none of us can stay healthy long enough for that... we're all currently in various stages of sick!

I'll leave you with some photos of life lately. I'll try not to pick too many!