You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.---Christopher Robin
Last night while talking to Tony before he fell asleep, I started to feel very anxious for the first time in a long time. Just thinking about how much the guest bedroom will need to transform in the next few months was making me a little uneasy. On top of that, just thinking about bringing a baby -- OUR BABY -- home and into the room that we were currently laying in was enough to make my heart beat out of my chest. Then I started to get nervous about parenting... and soon... I worked myself into a ball of worries. Thank goodness Tony is so logical and even tempered. (Note to self: Next time I start to see these traits as something negative, remember this!!!) He really calmed me down by not just listening to me, but thinking things out with me and reminding me that neither one of us are in this alone. We've got lots of support around us up here with our friends and family and ALL of our support system is just a phone call away. It made me feel especially secure when he pointed out that we're a team and if either one of us is feeling frazzled then the other person can always take over for a bit. It's a great feeling to realize my partner is confident in himself and in me, too. I have been nothing but excited lately and I suppose I was overdue for a healthy dose of "oh-my-gosh-what-are-we-doing!" :)
In other news, baby Duggan (we have got to get this girl a name!) has been kicking me ALL DAY!!! It's great to know she's there and active... but it's also getting on my nerves a bit, too - in a good way! You know when your muscle or eyelid (or any random part of your body) will repetitively twitch throughout the day and it's so annoying?? That's kinda how it's been today - same kick over and over in the same spot all day long. I will take it though since that is my main way of knowing if she's doing well in there.
Not much else to really say tonight... just really grateful for Tony being there for me. I'm hoping to be able to talk him into writing an entry in here one of these days about his thoughts on everything! I would love to hear things from his perspective and just take a peak inside his thoughts... I think it'd be fun. We'll see if I can talk him into it... in the meantime, you'll just have to put up with me! Night bloggies.
Those worries are perfectly natural and necessary to get you prepared for parenthood-- at least that's what I tell myself! I've certainly had my share, and am still experiencing them in these final days. It's so wonderful that your husband is so supportive! It makes a world of difference!!!
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