Women Connect: Time to grow up..?

I'm joining in on a "Women Connect" link up from Becky's blog "From Mrs. to Mama"  - and thank GOD for this because I have been in dire need to get something off my chest!

I just don't understand how I got to where I am.  I mean, I completely understand the concept of aging, but I've honestly never given much thought to how it applies to me.  And don't fret, this isn't the beginning of a "quarter life crisis" rant... just realizing, perhaps for the first time, what it's like to be a 25-year-old mother and wife who is partially responsible for the best interest of our off-the-wall, little family and our every-changing needs.

I mean, is it really time for Tony and I to grow up?  Are we truly the ones who make the decisions around here?  And does the decision-making EVER slow down?

There are a few extra-large decisions on our horizon that loom over my head on a constant basis.  But the number one item is...
  1. WHERE are we going to raise our family?

For starters, Tony has a great job here in the town we currently live.  We've lived here going on 5 years and despite our best efforts against it, we have put down roots here in the form of things such as a wonderful church family and having made some truly spectacular friends whom we love and cherish.  Not to mention, we have family here.  We don't really see my family very often but we know that they are there if and when we should ever need them.

BUT, we have never really felt like this is home for us.  It could be home if we committed to it, I suppose, but I don't think we could ever stop missing Tennessee and our southern family members.  Having both grown up in Memphis, ideally, that would be a fantastic place to move considering there is a lot of family support there.  However, I don't always feel safe there (or even in neighboring communities) and therefore, Memphis is off the table.

We've pretty much got it into our heads that we'd like to move to Nashville; it's closer to my sisters and Tony's family are still within a relatively quick drive.  Yet, making that huge of a move now with a little one is incredibly daunting.  The biggest issue for us is HOW on earth (in this economy, especially) do you leave a great, steady job that offers enough to support a family?  It is more than terrifying to put ourselves out there and to be vulnerable while looking for a job.  Not to mention, logistically speaking, how in the world would job hunting work if we are 10 hours away?  I've been looking online for jobs for either of us, but how would interviewing work?  I realize we live in an incredibly virtual world these days, but would employers really conduct an interview via Skype?  (That would be a dream, if they did.)  Not to mention, house hunting... *sigh*

As you can likely tell, this has been weighing very heavy on my heart and mind.  I know that we could find ways to make this work - but I am looking for that nudge in the right direction or possibly insight from someone who has done this successfully before.  Because moving is difficult and moving from Illinois to Tennessee wouldn't be cheap, either, and we don't want to naively jump into this before methodically making things work beforehand.  At the same time, we don't want to wake up several years from now wishing we had taken more chances in order to move towards our overall happiness.

Like I said before, making these decisions are only for grown-ups, right?  They are tough and they can be painful throughout... but with it comes great rewards!

So if you have any insights/advice/encouragement/thoughts/prayers - my husband and I could certainly use them and would appreciate them greatly.


  1. Very touch decision that you guys face, but sounds like you know where your heart is... it's just taking that final plunge. And when it comes to this economy, sometimes that "final plunge" is delayed. Hopefully with time you guys will be able to figure out a way to make it work and be where you want to raise your family most!

  2. :hugs: I know the feeling! We had to have Chris take a leap of faith just this week with his job situation. And yes--it is scary! My advice would be to take it one step at a time, and you might have to plan to go there for interviews (my friend's husband went to interview for a job 6+ hours away and they put him and my friend up in a hotel for it). But save up now for it, and make it fun! Maybe even leave Presley with family for those few days and get away together. That would suck terribly in a way, but it could also be fun and focusing for the two of you.

  3. I can relate. Stu is seeking for an adminstrative job, and we really want to relocate back to Green Bay (where we lived preivously) because that's where I felt most home at. Unfortunately, you know how entry level jobs are not always at locations you want/like, and we have to consider places that are even further away. It is frustrating because I just want to settle down, buy a house, have a back yard, and a bunch of babies near to our friends and family.

    I really like this idea. I will have to write up a post and join the club!

  4. I agree with Becky it does sound like you know where your heart is and to sound corny home is where your heart is...but in this economy it is going to be hard to make that final plunge. That is if and when you do it. I am sure whatever your decision in the end it will all work out, the hard part is making the plunge. Sorry I couldn't be of more help.

  5. Right now, we will be raising our family wherever my husband can find a job, but someday, I hope to be able to make a choice and find a place that feels like "home". I pray you'll get some kind of sign that will help you figure it out! Grown-up decisions are hard!

  6. Well that is definitely a tough decision. I can honestly say that plenty of employers are willing to conduct interviews over the phone. Plenty of my coworkers moved to take the job after a phone interview with a follow up in the next stage of hiring. I also love Nashville - my parents used to live there and its a really nice town. Hope that it all aligns for you and that it won't be as tough as it has been.


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